Too late
by flyin'rabbit
Summary: What Kurt could have been thinking right after the fight with Blaine, and somewhat later, in BIOTA. Two-shot, based on two songs.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N**: ... yes, another new story. In all honesty though, this is just a two-shot and the other part's been written already, so... yeah. I basically found two parts of two songs that I thought might be applicable to Kurt's 'situation' in BIOTA, so I tried to write something around them. It probably worked better in my head (it's probably very repetitive, my apologies for that). I hope Kurt doesn't seem incredibly OOC in this... I'm also sorry for the lame title/summary. I can never think of anything good :S

(spoiler talk: what's this about Blaine getting involved in a 'game-changing plot point'? I hope it's not something like the Jesse situation last season... :S)

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Glee or any of its characters. I also don't own the lyrics (_Don't you want me_ by the Human League :P) (that I tried to centre, but that didn't work. Oh well).

* * *

_It__'s much too late to find  
You think you've changed your mind  
You'd better change it back  
Or we will both be sorry _

So Blaine thought he was bi, all of a sudden? After having spent the past few years of his life being sure he was gay? He must've come out to at least a handful of people other than the students at Dalton, Kurt assumed – heck, getting bullied for being gay was the reason Blaine had come to Dalton. Or, that was what he'd told Kurt.

Should he start doubting everything Blaine had ever told him now? Because he suddenly decided that it was time for an identity crisis? He had always seemed so sure of himself, of his entire personality, of his entire being. He had seemed so confident when he'd told Kurt that he was gay, the day Kurt had come to spy on the Warblers. And sure, he had some demons in his past – he had run away from the bullies, something he appeared to hate himself for – but this was not the way to deal with that. Dating a girl you drunkenly kissed wasn't going to change anything.

At least, Kurt hoped that it wasn't.

Why couldn't Blaine get it through that thick head of his that sharing one kiss, one drunken kiss, with a girl wasn't going to change who he was? That people sometimes did stuff when they were drunk that they hadn't meant to do in the first place? That people drunkenly did stuff they would never have done if they hadn't been drunk, and would never do again while sober?

Sure, people were supposed to be more honest when drunk, but that didn't mean that everything people did or said while drunk showed exactly what that person was like, right? Kurt knew that he would never call Ms Pillsbury Bambi while sober, and he would also never vomit all over someone's shoes.

Unless he was in the locker room at McKinley – he might consider doing it, then. But otherwise, no way.

Either way, dating Rachel (_Rachel Berry_!) probably wasn't going to drive Blaine's demons away. Unless, of course, he turned out to really like Rachel. Then, he could pretend to be normal, like all the other people in Ohio. He could pretend to be straight, he could go to public school or anywhere else and not be bullied for once.

No matter how hard he might've tried, Kurt had never been able to pretend that he really was straight when dating Brittany, and he kind of resented the fact that Blaine obviously thought that he could, and maybe, he would actually succeed.

He hadn't been lying when he'd told Blaine how he looked up to him – not completely, at least. Yes, he admired how proud his friend had seemed to be, but he was aware that he'd made it seem like… his whole world revolved around Blaine. That might be partly true, but come on – he wasn't _that_ dependent on Blaine. Hopefully. But that didn't have anything to do with the fact that he admired Blaine's supposed strength – it had to do with the fact that he might be in love with him. Of course, he couldn't tell him that – not again, because it obviously hadn't made that big an impression the first time around.

All of a sudden, Blaine had changed his mind about being gay. Who did that? Being gay in Ohio wasn't something you willingly chose to be – look at Karofsky, and who knew how many other guys were struggling to accept their sexuality. It wasn't a joke, it was far too hard for that. So Blaine must've been serious when he'd come out – and now he was running back into the closet? That didn't make sense.

And now that they had fought over Blaine being bi or not – what did that mean for their friendship? Did it mean that, if Blaine turned out to really be into guys _and_ girls, their friendship would be ruined forever? That they would never hang out again because Blaine would feel like Kurt had issues with him?

That might actually be the case, Kurt figured. He knew he could – possible should – apologise at some point, but what if Blaine wouldn't accept those apologies? There was nothing more he could do than apologise, and yet there _had_ to be more.

Although – wasn't their friendship pretty much built on the idea of being two gay guys who had been through similar experiences and had many common interests? If Blaine suddenly wasn't gay anymore, wouldn't that be very damaging for whatever relationship they had going on?

Besides – Kurt didn't know if he could deal with having a best friend who was also _Rachel Berry's boyfriend_. He knew that he and Rachel had actually become friends lately, but he wouldn't let her get away with this. If she wanted his friendship and trust back, she'd better work for it. (Though he might at least _pretend_ to be a concerned friend the next couple of days in order to find out what exactly was going on between her and Blaine, since he was not talking to the other male, or so he assumed.)

Yes, the whole gay/bi question would have a huge impact his and Blaine's friendship. If Blaine would turn out to be not gay – it could very well mean the end of it, and that wasn't just Kurt being a drama queen of sorts. It probably wouldn't even be Blaine's fault; perhaps Blaine would attempt to strike up a conversation with him during Warbler practice or one of the classes they had together. But he, Kurt, would be too proud to let him in, too hurt to listen and to work it all out, and too disappointed in two people he thought were good friends of his.

So Blaine had better be gay. Even if them being gay wasn't a constant topic in their conversations, and they had enough common interests to keep a friendship going – it had initially been built on Blaine helping out Kurt, and, as far as Kurt was concerned, by now, they were equals in that relationship, and he helped out Blaine as well, even if that wasn't exactly obvious right now. But it would all become one big lie if Blaine turned out to be like all the others – straight, or at least, half-straight – and Kurt really didn't want to be friends with someone when that friendship was based on one big fat lie.

So – no matter how egoistical it might sound – for the sake of their friendship (and everything else, but Kurt decided it better not to dwell on _those_ feelings now – it was more than obvious that they were not reciprocated; friendship was all he was going to get for now, at most), Blaine _had better be gay._

_

* * *

_

**A/N**: So, what do you think? I hope it was somewhat believable and not really... weird. Anyway, let me know any thoughts or questions or anything else about the chapter - please review! :)


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N**: So, the second chapter's here :) It's a bit shorter than the first and I hope it's not incredibly repetitive and/or nonsensical (I tried, but I'm not sure if it's enough). This is pretty much what I think Kurt could've been doing/thinking when Rachel and Blaine were on their date - he's mostly angry and frustrated, but I'm sorry if he seems horribly OOC. Anyway, hopefully you'll enjoy it!

**Disclaimer**: Still don't own _Glee_, and the song isn't mine either (_Forget you_ by Cee Lo Green) (and no, it's not just coincidence that both songs have been covered by the _Glee_ cast)

* * *

_I see you driving '__round town  
With the guy I love and I'm like,  
Forget you!_

Kurt didn't think he'd ever hated spending the night at his house as much as he did now. Knowing that while he was sulking in front of the tv, behind his laptop or even doing some homework, Rachel was currently on a date with Blaine (_his Blaine!_ – although not really, of course) wasn't doing his mood any good.

How dare she just ask him out like that, knowing fully well how Kurt felt about him. What a friend she turned out to be. He should've seen it coming, though – they were so alike, they even fell for the same guys (though Rachel never seemed to be fazed by Sam, and Kurt had never seen the appeal of the bigheadedness of one Jesse St James). First Finn, now Blaine… and of course, both boys chose Rachel over Kurt. He should've seen that coming too. After all, it was much easier for a guy to date a girl than another guy.

It was moments like these that Kurt seriously considered Rachel's words when she'd told him that the two of them were actually very alike earlier that school year. If that was so true, then why would Blaine want to go out with Rachel, and not with him? The largest difference between the two of them was, of course, their gender – so did this really mean that Blaine could be bi?

And why did it have to be _Rachel_? The girl who took everything from him anyway, the girl who got everything he wanted as well, the girl who was everything he was _except in female form_?

They really were alike. A little too much for Kurt's taste, actually.

Only Kurt liked to think that, had the roles been reversed and he had made out with Rachel's potential boyfriend, who then didn't seem to mind turning gay, or bi, or whatever for him – he wouldn't have asked him out as boldly and readily as Rachel had asked out Blaine. He would have respected – or something like that – the fact that Rachel was really, really in love with the guy and backed off.

(Finn totally didn't count there – at first, he had a girlfriend anyway, and then he turned out to be very, _very_ straight, and also rather homophobic, at that. Somewhere deep inside, Kurt had known all along that he didn't stand a chance, and Finn was far from the only guy who could potentially reciprocate any feelings Rachel might've had for him, while Blaine was the only other out gay guy Kurt knew.)

Still, it was an awful thought that, since he and Rachel were so alike, he could've had a chance with Blaine – had he been a girl.

These thoughts kept bugging him the entire evening, and he hated it. If Blaine wanted to date Rachel, then fine. But as far as Kurt was concerned, he wasn't going to wait around. He wasn't going to either wait to pick up the pieces if one of them had enough of the other, and he most certainly wasn't going to be a consolation prize either.

If he could, he would banish all thoughts of the two of them out of his head – he would forget all about them and live happily ever after… or something. He was well aware that this was impossible.

He knew that before long, Blaine would start texting or calling him again, or cornering him in the hallways, wanting to talk about it. He knew that Rachel would pretty much do the same thing, only she might actually stop by his house (never mind that Finn lived there too).

For now, he tried to pretend that they – two of his best friends – didn't exist and he didn't mind at all. He tried to pretend that they weren't out on a _date_, possibly holding hands (or worse). He tried to forget all about the sickening feeling in his stomach, and he tried to forget about what was happening outside of the house.

(The next morning, he was sure that he didn't forget, because he'd been dreaming about the… date all night. All kinds of possible scenarios had passed by, so there was really only one way to solve his uncertainty – find Rachel and interrogate her. He'd forget her later (though he doubted Rachel would ever let him forget her, because _how could he forget about someone as fantastic and special and talented as her?_), but now he needed answers.

When he was finally ready to forget, she suddenly showed up at his doorstep one evening, declaring that tomorrow would be the day she was going to kiss Blaine while sober. After that day, he vowed, there would be no doubt whether he should forget about them or not, so he actually went along with her crazy plan.

And when he was simply forcing himself not to think about Rachel anymore (Blaine and he had talked it over, but Rachel had never apologised or anything, as if her behaviour was _normal_), she turned out to have written a song for Regionals that described his McKinley experiences in a frighteningly accurate way, and he figured that maybe, it wasn't so bad that he hadn't _really_ forgotten about her.)

For now, there was no world outside his house, there was nothing in the world except for him and his DVD collection, and there were no feelings that could possibly get hurt really badly tonight, or a little later. Though he knew that he could never forget those two in the long run, tonight, he would at least _try_.

* * *

**A/N**: So... what about it? Was it really bad? :S Let me know what you think (that would be very, very helpful and also very kind :D), please review!


End file.
